Photo by Malik Skydsgaard on Unsplash
Controlling the tongue
I've seen first hand the devastating effects gossip has on a relationship.
What a person's legacy can turn into with the misuse of one's information.
I've been told my whole life:
"If they gossip with you they gossip about you."
Being a fairly reserved person I tend to be on high alert when emotionally untrustworthy people are near.
Harsh but true.
If I know a person believes it is their right to know everything about me and also in their right to share whatever they please I will shut down and avoid them at all cost.
That is not because I am afraid of what they will tell others about me but simply because I find it morally wrong to scew the truth or wreck a reputation. Which is the only outcome of gossip.
With small children the desire is to surround them with people who are pure at heart. We love all yes, but loving does not mean allowing bad behaviors into your life.
Like many others I have found myself needing grace from my friends after sharing something that was not mine to share. The journey to fight the temptation of gossip is not easy.
Having to learn who the trusted friends are, the ones you can share your heart and hurts with and the ones who we love but unfortunately can't share much.
Likewise, if they are sharing understanding it is private and they see us as a trusted person.
Reminding myself:
"This was not a public conversation. Do I really want to break our bond by gossiping about this?"
No.
I write this to encourage you.
Holding your tongue is so hard but oh so worth the relational reward!
I DON'T write this because I'm perfect. I am far from innocent when it comes to controlling my tongue. It's a life long journey full of mess ups and need for grace.
This subject has simply been on my mind in this new year and I felt like sharing my heart.
I desire in 2023 to be pure at heart loving all with the understanding all will not love.
Let us give respect to our people by talking to them not about them.
Personally, this new year I want to hold my tongue and in that grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior. Jesuse Christ.
Won't you join me?
What a messy blog post. But a raw one.
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